


Until The Second Verse

by kangelique



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Music, Angst and Humor, At least i think it has humor, Belle & Captain Hook | Killian Jones Friendship, Emma and Ruby friendship, F/M, Falling In Love, Gen, Granny's Diner (Once Upon a Time), Grief, Inspired by Music, Sort of friends to lovers, Tuesdays and Thursdays, first chances?, i dont know why i like to write them in this music world but..., running away a lot, walls and the usual, you'll understand the significance later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-23
Packaged: 2020-09-06 06:54:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20287243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kangelique/pseuds/kangelique
Summary: She is always the one who sits in the back corner booth, set apart from the others, with her back pressed up against the wall and one earbud always half hanging out of her ear. And Killian notices she also always disappears right after he has finished the first verse of any song, and he wonders why there is an emptiness in the air whenever too many Tuesdays and Thursdays have passed and the woman with the red leather jacket and hair like sunshine doesn't walk through the door.He is the one who sits at the far end of the counter, obscured almost in shadow, with something like tension between his shoulder blades and forever nursing that cup of tea. He's there every Tuesday and Thursday to cover a new song, and with the emotion in his voice Emma has built a playlist. But she can't stay. She makes sure to catch a few lyrics and then like the wind she is gone and the yellow bug is her escape from feelings best kept behind closed doors. And its works. It does. For a while.Until one day she bursts into the diner with blood-stained fingers and he turns out to be more than she expected, and Killian realizes that maybe, just maybe, he doesn't have to search for her in songs anymore.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys this idea has literally been on my mind since the beginning of July.
> 
> Brief background: I was at this restaurant with my mom and she was buying that chicken she likes ( and I do not like) and then this dude came in with a guitar and boom! this was born and i actually took out my phone and wrote it down in notes cause my memory sucks "Emma is sitting at her favorite restaurant minding her own business and eating when a musician with a British accent comes in named Killian and they flirt or something like that and she is just always showing up at the restaurant when he sings" so yeah, it turned out longer than I expected.
> 
> Anyway, It's only been a month but i feel like I've been gone for years, and July was just sort of a rollercoaster of good ideas and trying to write those ideas out and sort of making it a pain in the ass for myself until I remembered this idea way back when and finally here it is.

**Chapter 1:**

Emma slid into the back corner booth with a sigh, one earbud half hanging out of her ear. In exactly two minutes, Ruby would come and accuse her of going AWOL again so she just leaned forward on her elbows and swiped her thumb across her phone screen to scroll down to the bottom. 

Track 32 it was. Maybe. She'd only caught a few lyrics last time before she'd shrugged on her red, leather jacket and quietly slipped out the door: "_There she stood in the street, smiling from her head to her feet, I said hey, what's your name..._" and then his voice had been cut off by the zooming cars and beeping horns and low buzz of other men and women talking into their phones and hurriedly passing her on the sidewalk as she walked over to her parked yellow bug right around the corner. 

For some reason she always inhaled a deep breath after, this odd feeling sitting heavily in the pit of her stomach for a moment whenever she searched the words up on Youtube, as if she'd stolen something that belonged to him -which was stupid because they were all covers anyway and they didn't belong to him either. She was ridiculous. _This thing _she was doing was ridiculous.

"You went AWOL again, you jerk. Name, place, and time please," Ruby demanded with an expectant arched eyebrow, appearing at her side only to tap her foot on the perfectly, polished black and white checkered tile floor, loosely crossing her arms over her chest and not even bothering to take out her notepad and pen.

"Wow. You broke a new record: a minute and thirty-two seconds, I think," Emma said with a grin, quickly turning off her phone so that it went black and repeatedly pressing the 'low' button so that Track 32 playing wasn't so loud and obvious to Ruby's weird, wolf-like superhearing. Ruby didn't even crack a smile. "Okay," she sighed. "okay, okay, it was uh, tracking this dude Will Scarlett. Turns out he was holed up in this town in Maine and it was an easy come and go. The guy had no experience and I just got back like -wait, what time is it- oh! Two hours ago."

"Mm, no bullets?"

"Seriously?"

"Any scars?"

"Oh my god."

Ruby rolled her eyes and sighed a long and drawn out sigh, hands slapping against her sides. "Well can you blame me, Em, you disappear for like two-hundred years-"

"Two _weeks,_" Emma clarified, eyes moving to the front of the counter without her permission. That black, leather jacket always sat at the very end, and he was there right now, probably nursing some hot cup of tea. Probably. His back was to her and given by the slight inclination of his head and tension between his shoulder blades and that rigid sort of way he had his elbows on the surface, Emma guessed it was either a bad day or a really bad day.

"You know you could just got up to him and ask what's wrong like a normal human being rather than stare at him like that might you answers."

"What?" She blinked. "No I don't stare."

"Yeah, and you don't yearn and do heart eyes or go on dates or whatever." Ruby scoffed. "You don't fool me for shit, you're lucky Granny hasn't called you out on it yet."

"She's rarely ever here," Emma reminded her, finally looking away and instantly regretting it when she was met with Ruby's knowing smirk. She shifted on her seat and cleared her throat. "Shouldn't you be, like, attending customers or something?"

"You are a customer," Ruby pointed out. Emma pursed her lips. Damn, she was right. Her nose wrinkled in consideration and she estimated a good thirty seconds before she was caught by the arm and dragged back to the booth. Ruby finally just sighed and pulled out her notepad from her apron pocket, pen at the ready. "Fine, I'll leave you to dwell on your love life. Grilled cheese or hambur -wait, why the hell am I asking, it's grilled cheese every time," she mumbled, shaking her head and her hand rapidly writing it down on the page.

"Actually...can you just bring me coffee?" Emma bit her lip at the same time Ruby finished writing and ripped off the page with a resolute _riiiip _and looked down at her pointedly, tucking the notepad back into her pocket and capping the pen.

"Nope," she responded brightly. "I know you and I know you didn't stop for anything at the gas station, so you're eating and staying and don't you dare tell me it's cream and two sugars because I already hate you."

"Okay," Emma laughed. "I promise to send you a text next time. Don't forget to put a side of onion rings too."

"Shut up."

She watched Ruby go back behind the counter to slap the order up amongst the other pieces of paper, feeling the smile slowly fade from her lips until she just pressed them together in a firm line and her eyes glanced to the end again. That was his spot. The long locks at his nape had been tied back into a short ponytail that first Thursday, or was it Tuesday? God she was absolutely ridiculous. But she adjusted the earbud in her ear and raised the volume so Track 33: "_I've sailed the ocean peaceful and I've seen the world's end, sometimes the roses fade to grey, just close my eyes and drift away, to all the worlds I have made I see clearest when I fall asleep..._" practically screamed at her. She settled herself further against the wall and waited.

*********

Swan was back.

The bell had chimed loudly at her entrance, door flung open, and his head had lifted up of its own accord at the sound of those boots moving hastily across the room to the booth that was furthest from the counter. That was her spot. Her spot had been empty for two Tuesdays and two Thursdays. Out of the corner of his eye he'd caught a flash of golden hair and that bright red, leather jacket and knew, _knew _ it was her. He didn't know anyone else with golden hair that swung lightly at her back and appeared to almost shine more yellow under the fluorescent bulbs, or anyone else who came in clutching the lapels of that red, leather jacket as though she could be nervous about something - "_Or someone,_" Belle had tried to suggest casually as she wiped the space in front of him and took the saucer with his drained cup one particularly late, Saturday evening.

"_I'm afraid I don't know what you're insinuating, darling,_" Killian had shook his head once, his hand already reaching for Jolly's neck leaning against the stool to his left.

"_Oh yes you do,_" she had snorted and he'd opened his mouth, some lame excuse or argument or both barely beginning to form on the tip of his tongue when she continued offhandedly, "_Her name's Emma Swan by the way, in case you're wondering. Favorite color is purple and she's single. Ruby thinks you should do something about that._ "

"_I thought you were already playing matchmaker,_" he had remarked with one side of his lips pulled up in a smirk. Belle had given him a look. "_Tell me, do you hand out the information of all your customers? I could be a serial killer for all you know._"

"_Except you're not because you're a musician. And we do take the customer confidentiality thing very seriously but...she's a friend, and she deserves the world._"

"_I can't offer her anything,_" Killian had said so softly, so low that he doubted Belle had even heard him. Fine by him.

After that little chat his conscious had started playing collector. The fact that purple was Swan's favorite color was stored away along with the notion that she always ordered grilled cheese with a side of onion rings -the tall brunette with the bold, blood-red lips personally taking it to her. Sometimes she'd get a glass of orange juice but mostly it was coffee, and she never removed the grey beanie from her head. There was usually an earbud half-hanging from her ear when she sat down, and Killian always wondered if she ever listened to what he sang when he pulled out his pick from his jeans back pocket and began to strum the opening chords of _Over and Over._

There were a few times when she was early and she would have a laptop in front of her, fingers flying across the keys and squinting at the screen and eyebrows pulled down low, and he got the distinct feeling that Swan was a woman who threw herself into her job -whatever was her job. He was only aware that he'd walked in with Jolly strapped across his chest by eight and she would be pressed against the wall already tapping her hand on the rickety table to some unknown beat, and Killian would wait but after the second cup of tea he would stand up from the stool and take center room and no Swan would show up for at least four or six Tuesdays and Thursdays.

"You playing tonight?"

"Hmm...?" Killian's head snapped up, the momentary realization that she was back broken by Ruby's voice interrupting his thoughts, and he half nodded yes. He straightened up, throwing the last fry into his mouth and rubbing his hands together. He really did it out of habit, the memory of he and Liam freezing to death in an alley with nothing but cardboard as blankets inspiring him so. No amount of teeth chattering or cracked lips or wind biting his cheeks could faze him now. "Of course, love, why?"

"Just making sure," Ruby said with a shrug of her shoulder but his eyes narrowed slightly at the faint smile on her lips, like she was in on some secret. "So how many songs today?"

"Three."

She sighed, muttering something incoherent under her breath as she removed his plate and he only managed to catch "so stubborn" and "running out" before she looked at him again, raising an expectant eyebrow and a hand on her hip. "Well what are you waiting for, Music Man, hurry up and get up there before she -shit, _THEY _ leave. I meant they, but there's a lot of she's here too."

"Aye," Killian laughed, sliding out of the stool and bending down to snatch Jolly up by the neck and quickly throwing the strap over his head. When he looked up, Ruby was still in the same position, her heel clicking impatiently on the tile, and he bowed without thinking, all smirk breaking over his face when he opened his arms and crossed his ankles and lowered his chin in deep respect. "As you wish, m'lady."

"Seriously?" Ruby snorted. "Belle told me you were a dork but not _this _much of a dork."

"I prefer dashing rapscallion, if you please."

"Ahuh." She rolled her eyes and then clapped her hands pointedly. "Chop chop, dude, chop chop, 24-hour service is only on weekends."

Killian turned and inhaled a deep breath, his hand slipping into his back pocket as he took a couple steps forward and his eyes locked with Swan's at the same time his fingers brushed over the pick. Her lips parted -maybe it was too far to tell- and he should have smiled or nodded in some sort of understanding, but he took the coward's road and closed his eyes instead, shaking his head slightly because there couldn't be any understanding and he couldn't be possibly be anything good for her -not when he still stirred awake with the sob caught in his throat and refused to listen to Liam's favorite songs and spent almost every moment of every waking day obsessively plucking at chords and repeating the lyrics out loud and searching for himself in every new cover.

Today his brother was nowhere to be found.

Today, his ashes had arrived in a meaningless brown box and he couldn't do it. He'd crumbled the note with his last wish in a fist and then ran and ran along Humboldt Park's trail until he'd fallen face-first into a pile of glittering white, the blood pounding in his ears and heart beating so fast he thought it might leap out of his chest. 

"_Years go by and I still remember your face, and how many times I numbed the pain, or how many times I tried to move on, couldn't get out of my own way..._" Someone passed behind him and Killian's eyes snapped open. He caught a whiff of something like vanilla and then the bell chimed and a door was slammed shut and he glanced across the room, blinking when his mouth momentarily forgot the next words, and he shook his head when he saw the empty booth and no Swan.

She was gone. Again.

"Should've smiled, you arse," he muttered to himself long after Ruby had turned the sign to **SORRY, WE'RE CLOSED.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

"Belle?" Emma called out, still holding the phone to her ear when she pushed the door open with her shoulder. 

A whoosh of warm air hit her face the second she stepped through the threshold and maybe she would've sighed if she weren't so focused on keeping the crumpled Mcdonald's napkin firmly pressed to her other palm. She stumbled to the front of the counter with burning ankles, her breath coming out in small puffs, and her heart thumping loudly in her chest. No doubt her cheeks were flushed too.

"Son of a bitch -Belle! Where are you, I need the first aid kit or...at least a better napkin, goddamn these stupid, useless, thin-ass Mcdonald's napkins," she muttered, slapping the said thing on the surface with a grunt. She poked at it with her finger and her nose wrinkled when she felt how soggy it was, soaked right through in a darkish red. Still no Belle. "Okay, do you have a rag or something, Ruby is...Ruby's gonna freak when she finds out about this...shit, is NOBODY working to-"

"You must maintain pressure on the wound, love," informed a voice that was so not Belle. 

Emma's eyes widened and her head snapped up so fast that her neck audibly cracked, and yep, definitely not Belle. She froze at the sight of him rushing towards her, mouth opening and closing and not a single word coming out properly except for uh...when he quickly removed the scarf around his neck and Emma blinked, one moment he was by the Men's Restroom and the next he was standing right in front of her and gently taking her hand by the wrist. "You must keep the pressure on," he repeated. "or else the bleeding won't stop. Hm, this isn't a gunshot, or a mere cut, stabbing perhaps?"

"Yeah," Emma breathed out and he was so close, the tip of her nose hovering over his forehead as he turned her bleeding palm this way and that, eyebrows knitted tightly together and one side of his mouth curled down as he kneaded his thumb into her skin for a minute. She couldn't help the hiss that escaped her lips. "Wow, that does hurt."

"Apologies lass, I was just checking for..." he trailed off, shaking his head as if he were trying to shake himself out of a memory. Of course Emma would know. Sometimes she did that too. 

The other hand with her phone had landed on his arm and it was hard to study his face like this, to try and figure out what had caused his sharp intake of breath. A beat passed where Emma kept her bottom lip between her teeth and he stared down at her palm for what felt like forever, his fingers now slick with red. She stopped breathing. She was afraid to move because he had the same expression as when he finished a verse, oddly entranced, oddly not there, and the "_Are you okay?_ " was about to leave the tip of her tongue when-

"Hey I heard shouting, is everything -oh," Belle gasped, hand flying to her mouth and spinning away from the coat rack so fast that Emma barely had time to register him clearing his throat because she was at her side in four seconds max. "What happened? Do I need to call an ambulance -wait. Maybe not. It doesn't look so bad. Never mind I don't know about these things, Killian do you...?"

"Aye," he nodded and continued wrapping the length of the black scarf around and around her hand until he finished it off with a tight knot that made Emma wince. He finally looked up and her breath caught in her throat. You could probably hear a pin drop in this place but she didn't give a damn. Not only were they a bit misty but they were so blue. So blue. Such deep, cerulean pools, and she still hadn't let go of his arm. Emma didn't think she could have if she wanted to. His eyes told her...stories.

"You're lucky Ruby isn't here, you realize how much she worries, right? Who did this, I want to know," Belle said, efficiently breaking up their little bubble with the concern lacing her voice. Her eyes flitted between the two of them and Emma snatched her hand back like he was on fire, abruptly releasing his arm and letting her hair fall forward to curtain her face until her ass hit the cool metal of a stool and she sat down with a sigh.

"Uh, it's no one you know. I was running after him and I almost had him too, _almost. _God, I was so close and then he panicked and sort of took out a knife and I had nothing and well...yeah." Emma shrugged, heat flooding her cheeks for some unknown reason as she avoided _his _gaze and she pressed her lips together in a straight line.

"What an asshole."

Emma hummed an agreeing hum, a crease forming between her eyebrows. "Yeah. Belle, where were you when I called you?"

"Oh, I was um, taking out the trash and Killian here was uh, gonna walk me home..." Belle trailed off, biting her lower lip and shifting on her feet as she waited for someone, anyone of them to break the silence that had fallen. Emma was nodding like yeah, everything was cool, and trying to ignore the dead butterfly now sitting in the pit of her stomach because she had no idea that stupid thing had been fluttering in the first place. Fuck. Fuck Ryan for forcing her to come in here for a dumb bandage -scarf, she got a scarf. _His _scarf. Fuck.

"No streets are safe for a lady at this time of night, Swan," he -_Killian-_said and it sounded like he was trying to explain something, assure her something, but all her brain registered was her name and her head finally snapped up.

"How do you know my name," she demanded.

"I might have let it slip out along with your favorite color and relationship status," Belle admitted in a rush and then she blew out a breath, her shoulders sagging. She looked at Emma's slightly widened eyes and lips parted in question and smiled. "It feels so good to have that out in the open, sorry."

"So much for the customer confidentiality crap or whatever," she mumbled under her breath, shaking her head and Belle scoffed. Actually _scoffed. _

"Come on, Em, it's not like I told him your darkest secrets-"

"Thank God, where would we be if you had."

"You're right, love," he -_Killian, _his name was Killian, he had a name now, he wasn't just the guy who sang really good covers, he wasn't just the guy she came to listen to because she was ridiculous and had been ridiculous for _months, _he wasn't just a he-agreed, corners of his mouth ticking up as he stepped forward and stuck his hand out. Emma blinked down at it, and for half a moment she could only stare at it, and then she abruptly took it and his skin was rough and calloused and warm, really warm. "Fair is fair, so on behalf of Belle's apology: The name's Killian Jones, at your service. Favorite color would be blue, more specifically Midnight Blue, and I'm afraid Jolly is the only woman in my life at the moment."

"Jolly?"

"My guitar."

"Well I have a cat." Shit. Was that necessary? Belle's effort to muffle her giggle into her hand when she quickly spun around answered that very clearly.

Killian smiled. A real, genuine smile with teeth on display, and she still hadn't let go of his hand. 

They were still shaking hands. 

God, his eyes lit up when he smiled like that. There was even the faint hint of a dimple.

"I've always been more of a dog person myself, back when-" he paused, a shadow crossing his face when he glanced down at the floor for the spam of two seconds and then looked up again, only half of his smile left. "Anyway, it's all taken care of, love. I inspected the cut and it doesn't appear to have gone that deep enough that it's fractured any tissue or bone, it should heal within the next ten days or so. I do recommend you wash it when you get home to avoid the chance of infection, perhaps try an antibiotic? But I'm fairly certain you should be fine, sweetheart, as long as you remember to change this cloth for a new one and rinse your palm thoroughly with water."

What the hell.

Emma and Belle stared at him with open mouths, like he'd just grown a second head or something equally unexpected. He cleared his throat, finger moving back to scratch behind his ear.

"That's an awful lot of good information for a guitar player. I just thought, I don't know. " She shrugged. "I thought you were a musician."

Killian released her hand and stuffed his deep in his pocket. Her head tilted slightly and when he looked up and met her eyes, it was maybe the first time she noticed the dark circles under there.

It suddenly seemed like he was a different person without the guitar strapped across his chest and the pick between his thumb and forefinger, and her heart thumping loudly meant something, something scary and true, and he wasn't the only one who had to inhale a deep breath. 

She did too. And heck, where were her walls when she needed them?

"Let's just say, in another life, I was a doctor."

"What happened?" Emma asked softly. Somehow she knew she threading into dangerous territory, _emotional _ territory.

"I failed."

*********

There was no beautiful, blonde hair and red, leather jacket the following Tuesday or Thursday. No door swinging open on Saturday and finding out that up close, Emma Swan's eyes were green. A forest green, an emerald green -or at least that how he preferred to think about it when he inevitably found himself gazing out the window with his chin propped in his hand and sleep determinedly evading him like the plague, never giving a damn that he would be stumbling down the hall with the first rays of the sun spilling through the curtains, or that there would be a hard throbbing like the beat of a drum at his forehead as he slumped on the seat of a bus and rode it all the way to Montrose Beach.

Maybe that was just a one time thing in her mind, and he was the fool. 

A fool that still thought about the feel of her soft hand, cool to the touch, and how her thumb had brushed over his skin when she took his in hers, and a side of her mouth had twitched up in an almost smile.

"Here you go."

They'd walked Belle home after and then he'd walked her home and she'd held up her hand with his tightly wrapped scarf in a small wave and mumbled, "_So, uh, thanks again._ " and he'd whispered, "_Of course. Have a good night, Swan._ " and that had been that. 

He should have asked for her number. Why didn't he ask for her number?

"A nice cup of chamomile tea," Ruby continued obliviously. "Still don't see what you like about these. Good for the nerves, I guess. You're so old-fashioned."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

She pressed her lips together and blew out a low whistle, shaking her head adamantly. "It's the 21st century, please don't."

Killian chuckled softly under his breath, perhaps for the first time since he walked in with his jaw clenching so tight that he was sure a vein had popped out and all the _before's _swimming around in his head, another endless wave of _what might have been _ had he called 911 sooner, had the crack of the bullet breaking through the air not immediately spurred his instinct to _survive, _had the fact that Liam had both earbuds in and was slightly bobbing his head to two originals not have been why he'd looked up too late and didn't even get two steps in before he fell to his knees and a sea of red exploded on the pavement and -Killian sighed, squeezing his eyes shut.

"Damn it. Damn me," he muttered and glanced down at the yellowish liquid, still and waiting unlike his bouncing leg on the silver bar of the stool. His mouth opened without thought and the lyrics fell from his lips in an unsteady mumble, "_Why do you keep reaching for my hand? Do you see something I can't? Why do you try to save me? This fate is well deserved, I only make things worse, why do you-"_

"What song is that?"

His head snapped up at that voice and suddenly his eyes couldn't believe she was here, sliding onto the stool next to him and dropping a Walmart plastic bag on the counter. "Swan," he breathed. "You've returned."

"Yep but you didn't answer my question and..." Emma looked at him, one eyebrow lifted up and the muscles in her throat visible when she swallowed. "You noticed?"

"That you were gone once again? Yes." Killian nodded. Of course he would. He'd counted the Tuesdays and Thursdays to keep track. "You're always the first to leave when I start the first verse of a song."

Her eyes widened and a blush broke over her cheeks when she coughed. "Oh, _that. _It- it's," She began to shake her head, hand reaching back quickly to tuck a loose strand behind her ear. He wanted to do that too. "It's not what you think, it's...I...just, well it's not what you think because I do like it."

"You do?"

"Yeah."

Emma had her bottom lip tugged between her teeth and her eyes were rather interested in her nails, palms flat on the surface and right away Killian knew she was nervous. She admitted she liked his music/singing/whichever it was. She liked it. And that was new. Liam's reviews still rang out like it was yesterday, his voice sounding thoughtful and that disagreeing hum clear in between "_Maybe change this line here, brother._ " and "_This line might be your most depressing one yet, little brother._ " 

It was new to hear that someone else liked it when he never uploaded those videos to his channel, when the world never heard about the sweat and the tears and the bad choices and the stabs in the back. But Swan liked it, even though it wasn't his words, even though it was a cover. 

Always a cover now.

"Save me," Killian said simply.

"What?"

"The answer to your question, love. It's called 'Save Me' by Noah Kahan."

For a moment they just stared at each other, and her eyes were probably searching as much as his, trying to figure the other one out. And then Emma finally inhaled a deep breath and looked away. The moment was broken and she straightened up. "Well I don't like the title," she stated with a small smile.

"Neither do I," Killian laughed and her smile grew wider.

"Listen, I-"

"Name, place, and time," Ruby interrupted in a commanding voice, her finger pointing at Emma all the way from the other end of the counter as she began to speed-walk toward them. Killian arched an eyebrow at her sigh and his mouth opened to ask what did that mean when Ruby cleared her throat loudly and waved him off with her hand. Emma rolled her eyes and shot him an apologetic look. "Come on, Em, this would go a lot faster if you just straight up told me -or if you actually used that stupid phone when you're away in like, Mexico, or getting stabbed by some asshole and not telling me about it."

"We're getting too old for this, Rubes," Emma sent her a pointed look. "This isn't high school anymore."

"Thank God it's not, junior year was hell," she huffed and shook her head as she leaned forward on the marble top with crossed arms and shifted her gaze between the two of them for a minute, eyes narrowing slightly until a smile slowly crept across her face and Killian noticed Emma's shoulders stiffen. "Tell me and you can get back to flirting with Music Man."

"I wasn't-"

"No, no, no, I don't care, tell me."

"FINE, fine," Emma sighed, bringing her hand up to rub her forehead and then dropping it back down on her lap. "Guy's name was August something -I forgot. Whatever, I don't try to remember- and he was all the way up in Phuket. That was...interesting." She shook her head and he was probably listening as intently as Ruby was. He couldn't help it. He had an infinite number of questions that had been building up on Emma Swan's life beyond the diner. "Anyway, long story short: he saw me, he ran, I caught him, brought him back handcuffed on the plane, and got back like an hour ago. There, are you happy now?"

"Mmm, any scrapes?"

"Just a little one, but I'll live. It wasn't a big deal, I was safe, I promise," Emma assured her softly.

It dawned on Killian as he watched this exchange that Ruby acted a protective mother of sorts or overly worried sister at best and that there was a history here and something heavy in her words, like she repeated them too often, and when Ruby nodded her okay and Emma turned to face him, Killian knew he recognized that look. The look of someone whose been left alone. "So. I bought you a scarf."

Killian looked at her, a smile playing on his lips when he said, "Is that so?"

She nodded, pushing the plastic bag towards him and tucking another curl back behind her ear. "Yeah, just to replace the one you had," She shrugged but she was biting her bottom lip and Killian realized she was nervous about this, about the scarf, perhaps even about coming to sit here. "It's the same color, not the same design though, sorry. I washed the other one but it still looked kind of gross so-"

"So thank you, love," he interrupted softly, smiling at her in assurance of many, many things. "You didn't have to, Swan. Getting to tend to your injury was my pleasure."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Okay, don't make it weird, Jones. I mean it was nothing, it's just a scarf, and you probably have hundreds more just lying around but I figured..." She shrugged again, shaking her head. "Whatever, there's your new one. Take it before I change my mind."

"Impatient, are we?" Killian asked, his smile growing wider, and she puffed out a breath. He tilted his head slightly, eyes beginning to understand the coil of dread that was twisting up his insides since the moment she walked in and fortunately tore him away from another more dangerous coil that was guilt. Once it appeared, it sat in his stomach and gulping down tea after tea wasn't enough, feeling the burn of that steaming liquid going down his throat wasn't enough.

And she had this air about her, the one of someone whose eyes were almost always flitting and leg was never still and could never stay in the same place for longer than an hour, and he didn't want that bell to chime yet or count another two or four Tuesdays and Thursdays to see her again, or have this stool be vacated so soon and he STILL hadn't asked for her phone number. Fuck.

"Tell me lass, do you threaten all the men you buy scarfs for?"

"Nope, cause I don't buy scarfs for any of them."

"Ah, so I'm special?"

"Nope, you are just taking too long to accept the stupid scarf."

Killian nodded and held up a finger. "But on one condition, love."

She rolled her eyes and gave him a look. "Fine, what?"

Fuck it all indeed.

"You'll stay for the second verse. _Until _the second verse."

Emma was quiet for a really long moment, her lips parted and eyebrows drawn together as if she couldn't quite believe he'd want that of all things. He felt he might have pushed his luck because he did want that of all things and she _still _hadn't said anything. But then she inhaled a deep breath and nodded and whispered, "Okay, Jones." and maybe one day she'd agree to the third verse and the whole song.

Regardless, Killian immediately wrapped the new black scarf around his neck.

And he caught the wink Ruby sent Emma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Songs used:  
Save Me by Noah Kahan
> 
> -Next up: I think next chapter is what you might consider the 'falling in love'. Maybe. Who knows. I mean they already have the hots for each other.
> 
> -Thanks for every comment and kudos so far!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:**

Her staying meant something.

Emma knew her staying meant something when her heart had already been thumping loudly in her ears and she had to exhale slowly after he picked up Jolly and Ruby came to pat her gently on the back because she was Emma and she never stayed. Never. She was bad at staying. Really, really bad. 

But she stayed for the second verse and before Killian could turn around to see her tightly clutching the lapels of her jacket and her bottom lip tugged between her teeth, Emma had already jumped up from the stool and pushed the door open a little harder than was necessary. She wasn't good at this and practically running back to her bug and hand fumbling in her pocket and dialing Graham to ask for a case, _any _case proved her point.

Her staying meant something but her coming back meant something more. 

Emma's feet seemed to have developed a mind of their own when she crossed the threshold to Granny's diner the following Tuesday, and her eyes landed on him staring down at this cup of tea with a strong tick in his jaw on Thursday. She'd plopped down on the stool next to him with a huff and the question: "_So bad day or really bad day?_ " was out of her mouth before she could bite down hard on her tongue.

Sometimes Killian would shake his head and half smile at her and try in vain to assure her " _It's nothing, love. _" but Emma didn't believe him for shit. But sometimes he'd be waiting for her at the back booth, her coffee with cream and two sugars ready, and he would start talking about a Liam who'd adored the sea and had stayed up late nights quizzing him for the medical finals and what a _stubborn arse _he could be for not letting him give up and open the bottle of rum, and Emma knew. Emma knew, _knew _ that when his eyes briefly glistened and that fond smile appeared on his lips and that longing took up residence in his voice and she'd lose him to memories for a moment, she _knew _that Liam had been more than just his brother. 

Liam had been his everything.

They fell into a sort of pattern when Killian would ask about her day

Emma would straighten up when Ruby set down a plate of freshly-made onion rings in front of her and his blue pools would feel so sincere on her face. He would lean in closer just to hear her better and their arms would be an inch away from touching and she'd talk. Emma would tell him about this couple she was tracking, Tamara and Greg, that were like the Bonnie and Clyde of the 21st century, and she'd admit how her gut told her there was a piece of the puzzle missing. All the doubts she'd been holding in like she held in a breath would spill from her lips in a jumble of words and questions and half ideas. And Emma would feel her shoulders relax and Killian would nod at all the right places and after, when she would be hugging a pillow to her chest she'd replay their conversation in the darkness of her room and this was different. 

_He _was different.

Emma would think about Neal and how he'd always brushed her off with a shrug or a wave of his hand and a "_You worry too much, baby, it's not that important._ " But it was to her. It mattered to her, and Neal wouldn't ask questions, wouldn't wonder about her progress, and had rarely ever given her arm a light squeeze of encouragement and Killian...Killian did all of that in the hour she stayed.

She'd hug her pillow then and bury her face in its softness and curl up on her side and he was absolutely different. It was weird and new and some part of Emma had clung to the small ball of hope that he'd be like the rest, but he wasn't and that realization made her stomach contract up in knots and her heart beat speed up.

Eventually Ruby just started bringing her order of grilled cheese and onion rings and his of hamburger and fries to the same spot. 

Once as he was standing up it burst out of her mouth how he always smelled of salt. Ruby's ringing laughter behind her only made the heat spread faster over Emma's cheeks and Killian had chuckled softly and deemed it due to the docks. Amongst the sound of rain pelting the windows he confessed he was almost done writing an original, and the butterflies never failed to begin flapping their wings when he took her hand and placed a light kiss atop right before he left to sing.

Killian wore that scarf like it was a promise of something, and Emma tried not to linger on what it would be like to run her fingers along his scruff. She tried not to care. She tried to ignore Ruby's teases about how it looked like she was walking on cloud 9, and shit, maybe she was. Maybe that's what all those stupidly cheesy, romantic Hallmark movies Emma liked to roll her eyes at and wrinkle her nose at were actually about, and shit did she shake her head and wringle her hands together every time she thought about how an hour with him wasn't enough.

Emma wanted more. So much more than Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Her eyelids began to droop when Track 76 started playing: "_What are you chasing? Why are you changing? What do you think you'll find? Packing up your suitcase, tearing out the driveway, you can go, you can take your time, lights will shine but I won't fade, I'll be here waiting if you come back this way cause I'm the man who stays..." _ and deep down the urge to run was dwindling and it was scary as hell.

*********

So it happened. 

Killian was no expert on love. Far from it. But he had no control over the smile that broke across his face when their eyes locked and "_Hey beautiful_ " fell from his lips more times than he could count. 

Belle pointed out how he'd straightened up whenever she walked in and that he didn't stare down at his tea with such a murderous expression as often as before. 

Killian awoke Tuesdays and Thursdays to a certain anticipation in his veins and impatience in his step. He would gaze out the window of the moving bus to shops barely switching their signs to **OPEN **and birds already chirping and there were only ever one or two strangers walking down the street, and his mind would drift to forest green eyes and hair like sunshine and apricot skin.

Some nights Killian would still awaken with the sob caught in his throat and the blurry image of Liam going still in his arms. But most nights it was the way Emma's eyes crinkled and her nose scrunched up when she laughed, _truly _laughed, that invaded his subconscious, and for the first time in a long time he dreamed of something more than blood-stained fingers and the loud wails of a siren that was too late.

That ever-present ache in his chest seemed to slowly lose its capacity to render him a useless heap on the floor just as slowly as she crept under his skin. 

On the days when Killian felt the emptiness in the air because no red leather jacket appeared, he would search for Emma in the songs that played through his headphones. It was as he was staring at the horizon that he decided to lay down on the bench. He'd inhaled a deep breath through his nose and his thumb had hovered over the 'Play' on Liam's phone screen, and he'd finally did it. Finally heard them all and then pressed 'Repeat' when he reached the end of the list just as the sky had turned an inky blue. Killian had sighed after that and knee-deep in water, he'd opened his fist and allowed the ashes of his brother to be carried away by the ocean's waves as the note had instructed him to do.

Perhaps a huge piece of that beaten organ had mended there.

Emma came back and Killian knew that he breathed out her name every time she did. 

The bell had chimed and Killian's head had snapped up and he hadn't realized his shoulders had sagged in relief until the panic flashed across her face and she halted mid-step. He hadn't meant to reach out a hand, but he did, and it was instinct, and the worse thing in the world had been not seeing her. And then Emma did something that probably knocked the air out of Ruby's lungs because her eyes were blown wide, and Killian still believed he couldn't offer her anything. That didn't seem to matter when her arms went around his waist, and his eyes fell closed, and all doubts ceased to exist and all scattered thoughts froze as her cheek hit the spot where his heart beat loud and uneven, and his fingers found their way into her hair.

Emma sighed against the leather and he swallowed thickly because he felt so much for her. Killian couldn't help the pacing back and forth whenever he didn't know if there was another bastard out there stabbing her hand or pointing a gun at her head. He'd buried his face in the crook of her neck and tightened his arm around her back and pressed her body closer to his chest, and he just didn't want her to be the one who got away.

That became a thing.

And neither of them spoke about the need to feel each other's solidness the second she walked into the diner. It was important. It was _meaningful,_ and Killian thought that perhaps he would continue to run his hand through his hair and keep holding in the truth like he held in a breath.

So on Saturdays while Belle was moving from table to table picking up empty cups and crumpled napkins, Killian would be sitting at the back booth with his back pressed up against the wall and his legs laid out straight in front of him and the pick between his thumb and forefinger. He would close his eyes and imagine it was Emma who was listening to him sing : " _So I've been waiting for you to come around, you're never late, is your heart at sundown? You let me inside to your sacred space and I thought we could be safe in this place but we're not..._"

Belle would shoot him a knowing smile over her shoulder as Killian began to strum slower, and he would lift up the tiniest of smiles back. The hope in his voice pierced through the blanket of silence like a sharp knife. " _So I thought if you and I believe, that you'll discover another love with me, So I thought if you and I believe, that you'll discover another love with me, 21 seconds from saying those three words..._" And there was the truth. 

He was completely, definitely, and absolutely in over his head, and Emma wasn't ready to hear that.

It was on one such occasion that the door was thrown open and Emma walked in with a hand covering her cheek. Belle had barely turned around to go get that bag of frozen peas she requested when he was already prying her hand away gently and shaking his head at the long line of protests falling from her mouth. Emma's eyes had stayed clued to his face the entire time he ran his thumb over her upper lip and along the side of her nose and she'd gasped softly when he patted the apple of her cheek. Killian informed her it would take at least six weeks to heal and she'd cursed Tamara under her breath.

They'd gotten into a fight, shots had been fired, Emma had been punched, and Greg was now behind bars. Killian had brushed his lips across her forehead without thinking. He'd heard the breath catch in her throat and she'd looked up, eyelids already half swollen, and he still had her face between his hands, and it occurred to him as he stared down at her and his finger kept absentmindly going up and down her skin that she'd done something impossible.

She'd helped him let go. 

She'd made him want to stitch himself back together, and when Killian brought his forehead down to rest on hers and her hands only tightened on his shoulders, he was almost sure it wasn't just his world that had tilted off its axis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Songs used:  
Man Who Stays by Jake Scott  
21 Seconds by Cian Ducrot
> 
> -Next up: Finally some declarations, yay!
> 
> -Thoughts are welcome!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Aw, I'm a little sad that the story has ended so soon but I'm fairly pleased with the writing and everything and thank you for every comment and kudos, I'm so happy to see that you guys enjoyed it. I hope this ending gives you some closure but not all closure (You'll know what I mean later) 
> 
> -All Songs used:  
All Right Now by Free  
1000 years by Nathan Wagner  
Limbo by Whatever We are  
Man Who Stays by Jake Scott  
21 Seconds by Cian Ducrot  
Clear by Need To Breathe  
Save Me by Noah Kahan
> 
> -And I hope you like it!

**Chapter 4:**

"What the hell is this?"

"Uh, I think it's called a cupcake, Em," Ruby said matter-of-factly and Emma felt the corners of her mouth quickly downturn, the argument already lying on the tip of her tongue when she glanced up at the smile Ruby was seriously trying to suppress by pressing her lips together and then looked at the _thing -_this horrible, sweet, carefully frosted purple thing sitting in front of her and daring her to light the stupid star-shaped candle that she had immediately thought was better than any 2 or 6 number-shaped candles would have been. Ruby groaned. "Oh come on, Emma, just take it. It's chocolate -your favorite- and I heard they're even more delicious when it's your bir-"

"No, Rubes, we agreed," Emma sighed and leaned back, as far away from the thing as she possible could, crossing her arms over her chest. "You promised you would treat today as any normal -"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, as any normal day and blah, blah, blah," Ruby cut her off, nodding her head and raising her hands up in a sign of surrender or not guilty or who knew. She pursed her lips, shoulders sighing down with her. "But I honored your wishes as much as it _pains me _to do it, I did it. The cupcake's not from me, and you're a terrible human being, you know that? Not even letting me buy you a present..." she muttered accusingly.

"Okay, then who's it from?"

She rolled her eyes. "I don't know, Emma, there's a card with it. You could try reading that to see if there's a clue."

"Granny?"

"I'm this close to killing you right now."

"Belle doesn't know, does she?"

"You realize there's no one else here and I could just dump your body in a garbage bag and be done with it, and I would no longer have to worry about 'Name, Place, and Time'."

"Ruby, please," Emma's voice had taken on a slight whine as she straightened up and widened her eyes up at her. She didn't even know what she was asking, but she'd done a good job of avoiding the words and not hearing the words and now she really wanted it to be past midnight.

"Read. It."

Something in the way Ruby insisted it through gritted teeth and pointed a finger at it made her almost automatically snatch up the card.

Emma stared at it for a moment, as if by squinting at it hard enough it would reveal what was on the inside. 

It was nothing but a folded piece of paper with her name written in cursive on the front. Yet her heart was thumping wildly and she wasn't even sure why. Emma wasn't good at this. She wasn't good at today, or how it was supposed to be special and special involved balloons and presents and a slice of cake and all the things she had trained her mind not to expect. 

Fuck, she sucked at this.

"Hey," Ruby said softly. "For the record, I think it's long overdue that you let someone else care about you."

Maybe. But that didn't make this any easier. Releasing her bottom lip from between her teeth, Emma inhaled a deep breath and finally opened it. Her eyes quickly landed on three, simple words written in black.

_ **Happy Birthday, Love. ** _

"Well?"

"Killian," she whispered in awe, a wobbly smile breaking over her lips as she closed her eyes and pressed those three, simple words to her chest. Ruby was right. She knew she was right. 

"I fucken knew it!"

"Did he play tonight?"

"Mm, one song and then he sort of ran out of here."

"How the hell did he know," Emma sighed and then her eyes slowly narrowed up at Ruby, tilting her head as she arched an eyebrow. "Did you...?"

She huffed, dropping her hands to her sides with a loud slap and then leaning forward to pull Emma up by the elbow. Emma's lips parted and she didn't even have time to blink before her forehead was knocking into Ruby's chin with an 'oof' and there was two arms wrapping tightly around her back. For a very long minute all that was in her vision was brown and she might have actually stopped breathing, but she let Ruby squeeze her hard against her as much as she needed to.

"Not every guy is Neal or Walsh -ugh, _Walsh_\- or whatever other idiot that let's you down, Em. Not every guy is out to break your heart."

Emma knew. she knew that for the first time the moisture gathering behind her eyes wasn't because instinct was screaming at her to jump into her yellow bug and put miles and miles between them -quite the opposite really. That need to fight or flight had come to a screeching halt, and Emma wasn't even sure when his smile and laughter had begun to seep into her thoughts. She couldn't pinpoint the exact moment when an hour stopped being enough, or when his voice had started to act like a balm over all her burning pieces. But it happened, and it dawned on her as a crease formed between her eyebrows and she swallowed past the lump in her throat that this wasn't where she was supposed to be. 

"I...I think I have to go."

Ruby nodded at least three times. "Go. Put us all out of our misery."

"Who's all?" Emma laughed but Ruby just sighed and shook her head.

"Hate me for the rest of your life but happy birthday."

"I still think it was you."

"Oh my god, just GO."

*********

Killian kept crossing and uncrossing his legs. He kept tapping his knuckles against his mouth. He glanced at the clock. 11:52 PM. The diner's sign had certainly been switched to **CLOSED **by now. He'd only sang one song tonight. 

It was by some miracle that his eyes had landed on the calendar taped up on the far wall and there had been April 16 repeatedly circled in bright red pen and holding a generous portion of exclamation marks, and it made sense. 

He'd known something was off when Emma stiffened at Ruby's sing-songed "_It's almost here_." in passing their booth, and today it had finally dawned on him why her stool was empty. Maybe it was a long shot, but Regina's bakery around the corner had popped into his mind. Killian knew Emma and he knew himself too and coming in on two particular days of the week was habit for him too. She would go. Maybe. But now he was alternating between staring at Jolly and staring out the window, and he wondered if he should have written more, if a few more minutes and she would have walked in, if -there was a light knock and his eyebrows furrowed.

"Hey," Emma said when he opened the door. She took a step forward, quickly tucking a strand of hair back behind her ear. Killian smiled; that was always her giveaway. She looked up at him, eyes a bit wide, and the corners of her mouth lifted up in a tentative smile. So much wondering and now the words were caught in his throat. Killian was only faintly aware that his lips had parted and his eyebrows had most likely flown up to his forehead and no sound was coming out. He couldn't even string a sentence together. "I, well, uh, Ruby said you left in a hurry," she mumbled.

His eyes fell on the purple smeared across her chin. "So I take it you did get my present," Killian chuckled softly. 

Emma began to shake her head when he moved forward and he heard the soft gasp when his hand found her hip. She closed her eyes when he cupped her cheek, and ever so gently he wiped away the frosting with the pad of his thumb. 

"Thanks," Emma said quietly, her bottom lip disappearing between her teeth and she shrugged a shoulder. "I may or may not have eaten it on the way here."

Killian gazed down at her with a longing smile she couldn't see. He was running his finger down the side of her nose and over her upper lip and it was the bleeding palm and broken cheekbone all over again because he couldn't let her go until he'd made sure there wasn't a wound he could tend to. "You do this every time," Emma sighed but pressing her lips together didn't stop the smile from spilling.

"Can you blame, darling? Sometimes you come back to me hurt."

"I'm not good at this," she whispered.

"Not good at what, sweetheart?" he asked softly.

Emma opened her eyes and inhaled a shaky breath. She blinked quickly and a crease instantly formed between her eyebrows. Killian watched her closely, and for a moment she went so silent that he was almost positive she could hear his heart thumping in his chest. "At this, " Emma suddenly blurted out. "At-At dates and labels and staying because when I was a kid I always ran away and now I stay for more than the second verse, and you...God, I'm so bad at this, but you...just, it's just one hour with you isn't enough, and how did you even know what today is, and fuck I wish I was better at this, what I'm trying to say is -" Suddenly she grabbed the lapels of his jacket and it wasn't gravity abruptly pulling him down when he felt his mouth come crashing against hers. 

Killian's hand was still holding her cheek as she captured his lips again and again. He inhaled sharply through his nose when their tongues met and Emma pushed upward, her hands leaving his chest to smooth over his shoulders and run up the sides of his neck until she found the locks at the back and took them in her fists. Killian's arm had finished snaking around her waist and her body molded against his, his fingers quickly losing themselves in her hair as Emma tilted her head and he dipped his tongue into her open mouth with a sudden urgency, as if she would pull away right this moment. 

Killian didn't want her to.

Perhaps Emma sensed this because she pulled him firmer against her chest and kissed him back harder, so hard that his lips hurt for the briefest of seconds and then Killian's tongue was spiraling up with hers and her grip on his hair tightened with every graze of their teeth. One of their backs roughly hit the door -His,Hers?- and Emma gasped when it trembled on its hinges. Her hands found his shoulders at the same time his finally grasped her thighs and it was a hazy blur of Killian lifting her up and her legs quickly locking around his waist and her giggle in his ear. He turned his head and she didn't even give him a chance to breathe before she was seizing his lips slowly and surely and he was doing the best he could to pour _something, everything _into it as he followed her mouth. And then her hands were undoing the buttons of his shirt one by one and he wasn't stopping her and there was a million sparks being left in her wake as she trailed her fingers lower and lower and-

"Emma, are you certain?" Killian pulled his head back. 

He had to ask. 

He opened his eyes to search her face. He saw the cheeks that were flushed a bright pink and the lips that still chased after his in a daze, and he wanted her to be sure of this, _of him. _He didn't want to become someone she regretted. He had to ask even as her hair fell forward to curtain them both when she leaned her head down, panting almost in rhythm with his, and she took his cheeks in her soft hands and sighed against his mouth.

"I like you," Emma breathed out, pressing her forehead to his. Perhaps his heart burst right then and there when the corners of her mouth ticked up in a small smile and she nodded, as if she were convincing herself even further. "Yeah, I like you a lot."

"Enough to let me court you?"

"Enough to let you court me," she assured him softly, her smile widening.

"I more than like you, Emma," Killian admitted quietly. And it wasn't exactly those three simple words that were always on the tip of his tongue nowadays, but it came fairly close and her smile didn't fall and her thumb didn't stop caressing his skin and that was momentous in itself. It was big, it was important, and she was - "_You are the moonlight in the sky that I'm pursuing, you are the reason for what I'm doing, you are the crystalline that keeps me from my ruin, you are the movement, you're the true north pointing back home, you are the constant, my constellation, you're the steady hands of a ticking clock that I've come to rely on,_" he murmured in her ear and she laughed softly.

"You remembered."

"That it's one of your favorite songs? Aye. I was going to perform it tonight." _For you, _Killian was truly saying, and when Emma responded by kissing him amorously and then breaking away to place little kisses along his jaw he knew that she understood perfectly. More than perfectly.

"I'm a mess, you know that?"

"I'm not too far behind," Killian countered back easily and she nodded, her eyes falling closed again when he met her lips halfway.

"So what are you waiting for? Take me to bed."

"Well if the lady insists."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Song used:  
Clear by Need To Breathe
> 
> -Don't hate me too much for not involving the 'I love you'. I just thought "Well this is Emma and what would make it more realistic or believable" and so it was an 'I like you' instead but we all know the truth. ANNNDDDD I'm also curious if you guys wanted to have more insight into Killian's past or like the friendship with Ruby or ideas for 'After' stuff that you may want to see? If you do, it's all welcome in the comments.
> 
> -Thanks for reading!


End file.
